When a Caregiver needs some time away but the Caretaker is not ready. This post is being created in Real-Time. There may be some affiliate links included in this post which if you were to click on and make a purchase I would receive a small commission. As always my goal is provide information that I have learned in my experience and share with others.
MY WISH LIST AS A CAREGIVER
To go OFF THE GRID (even if for only a little while)
DO NOT clean
DO NOT cook
DO NOT do laundry
DO NOT have internet
DO NOT have phone service
DO NOT have texting
DO get up and journal at 3am if I want
DO take a nap if I want
DO take a shower if I want
DO eat a bacon wrapped banana for breakfast if I want
DO enjoy the quiet
DO sit by the fire
DO get more active
LOOK up at the stars every night in amazement-they don’t have this many stars in the city
WATCH the chipmunks run around without a care in the world
HEAR all the night-time sounds of nature
SO…the summer of 2018 I booked a CABIN for the fall way up in the middle of GODs COUNTRY for a week so that I could get away and just RELAX.
YES it all sounded great on paper but the logistics were just not worked out… I canceled that trip and just stayed home.
SO…the summer of 2019 I booked a CABIN for the fall way up in the middle of GODs COUNTRY for a week so that I could get away and just RELAX.
YES it all sounded great on paper but still the logistics were not worked out. As hard as my daughter tried (and she did try) she started having PANIC ATTACKS at the thought of me being OFF THE GRID for any length of time. She got herself sick and was quiet and the more we tried to come up with a solution where she would be comfortable with me being away the closer we got to the BREAKDOWN. I was to leave on the weekend and the BREAKDOWN happened while I was at work on Thursday.
Those of you reading this post who care for a loved one who battles a form of anxiety or depression or a host of other mental health disorders DREAD that call.
The call that starts off about something else but by now you are quite familiar with what is coming. I will not go into any detail other than some things were said that made me leave work early that day and head home.
When I got home she was “a mess”. I sat with her on the bed and we discussed the “somewhat exaggerated” reason she needed me to come home and what was really going on. My trip.
I am now at the point when I need to make a decision.
#1, Do I once again cancel my trip and stay home with her like I did last year?
#2. Do I go on my planned get-a-way and worry about her the entire time I am gone?
#3, Or do we figure out a way that I can still get some of my WISH LIST but she comes with me?
If you guessed OPTION #3 you were correct.
So my trip which I am still on while typing this into a word document sitting outside by a nice hot fire is going well. The wish list was expressed and she was very set on helping me achieve as many goals that I could.
She really has been GREAT and I have to admit it was nice to actually play some POKER in the cabin for a few hours and watch how she enjoyed kicking my butt at MEMORY and BLACKJACK.
She is getting to sleep a lot and I am getting to journal a lot which seems to be a good trade off. At home when I try to work on adding to my JOURNAL she seems as if I am using it as a way to get away from her BUT here she knows that is why I came and she accepts that.
She has laughed at my fire making skills and my fishing skills and I am OK with that and am enjoying having her here with me. She is not thrilled that the cabin I picked requires her to walk 1000 steps round trip just to use the facilities. I love it. I am not achy when I wake up in the morning since I had a nice middle of the night stroll trying not to step on a frog-it is bizarre how many frogs come out at night up here.
SO what logistics am i talking about?
That will bring us to the next post. Soon I will be posting about the FEAR OF ABANDONMENT and how it has affected our world. Some is real and some is imagined but I will go into detail on that next time.
HEADING over to grab another log for this amazing fire I built at 6am this morning while watching the sun rise over the lake…YES I am getting my WISH LIST on the trip for sure.
Keep fighting the good fight